cruft for the world.

July 26, 2005

Top ten awesome things Portland Organ emailed to me.


10. As you have heard, I passed away in my recording studio today. You may hear reports that I died of a heart attack, or drug related problems but I assure you that this is just the media jumping to conclusions, and that was not the case. The truth is i died of something much more serious,...
....a broken heart.
Now I know what your thinking,...."But Dirty, what woman could hurt you?" ....A woman didnt hurt me, y'all did. You aint phoned me in years, you never e-mail....whens the last time you even free styled a lil' sum-sum for your boy? I may be a big hip-hop'n superstar, that lives large, in large cars, but I still feel....I still hurt.
And now its over. I only wish that we all had one more day. See you on tha crossroads.
-Old Dirty Bastard (ODB)
PS-Pour one down, for your homie in tha ground. Fa' Real.
PPS- WU-TANG, WU-TANG!

9. I am gay.

8. I have a feeling I may have e-mailed you this morning. I was blind. With drunk. Drunk.
When you arrive, I will hold you.
Hey, you should DJ the show on the 21st of Dec.

7. Its a xmas show at the pic.
the show will include:
42
bel riose
mohawk lodge
timber (from montreal)
and you.
We made it so that the bands would play for free in return for no cover at the door.
also, all the bands will be playing Radio Thunderbird Hell on the 16th of December, as one big band. Its gonna be stupid.
what do you want to be called for the show?.....or did you want to actually play as Tachikoma Kun?.....because thats cool too if you would rather do that.

6. Hey all,
I gots me a cell phone.....still have the home phone as well.
so to re-cap:
New Phone # - 604 555 5555
home -604 555 5555
Im glad I got that off my chest.
...and I would also like to give a big shout out to my boy Jesus on his birthday.

5. Props go to Kemal's "the Table", & Twinn's "the Complex". ---Ratings gold!

4. Hey everybody,
I thought that if it was cool with everybody, I would bring my perfect boner to GHDX. I just wanted to pass the idea along in case someone else was planning on bringing theirs. If so, could you let us know, so that we can emotionally, and physically prepare for the occasion by properly dressing up our perfect boners, and stocking up on lube.
Thanks again,
F.F.Copola

3. I'm gonna make you sweat.
Love,
- Cuba Gooding Jr.

2. Today is a special day!!!! Carrot Top turrns 40!!! Tonight we celebrate!!! with Knives!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1. You will be the drunk face that will fly in the future to the land of Yellow Junko Tsunami pussy efforts. I will care for you like a baby in my arms. It will be magnificiant.
Bee-hive,
Albert Brooks

1 comment:

angrycobra said...

Portland organ is a drunk wang. He thinks that he is funny, but he is just a heartless jerk. Why anybody would glorify his behavior is beyond me. How about instead of making fun of religion, and disrespecting the dead, we try and do something positive? And what's with nobody wanting to love me in return? That just makes me want to judge people.